Eh, I seem to have alot to say today.

Umm.. I was just reading the blog I had written a lil less than two weeks ago, about Si Ning telling me she remembers baby's smell. Then I thought of baby's reaction when he read the blog (he told me about it). Then I thought of how long has it been since we last had a decent conversation... I just saw him yesterday, but we didn't do much, just had dinner and watched tv.. We have been seeing alot less of each other, and I am getting used to it.. It used to be almost everyday, then talk in iRC.. Then sometimes, we message each other.. Now, he doesn't seem to be online most of the time, even if he is, he is away, or I'm away, or I'm not online. We see each other about once in two or three days.. Even if we talk, after about 5 minutes I get chased off to bed..

It is a very delicate balance of too much or too little..

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder"
Everytime I miss him, I tell myself to quit being a baby and stop needing someone so much. And it has been working better recently. But absence and constant self psychoing is making my heart grow harder.. And I wonder if that is a good thing.

I, problematic? I know..
Worry too much? Maybe..
Scared? Very..
Insecure? Getting tougher..
Bored? A little...
Love baby? Yes...

Ah, what a mess..

Sleep.